What's the best way to ask for feedback from my manager?

The best approach is to make your request specific, low-pressure, and action-oriented. A vague “Do you have any feedback for me?” often gets you “You’re doing great,” which isn't very useful. Asking about a particular skill, project, or behavior tends to produce much better feedback.

Try this structure:

1. Set the intention: “I’d like to keep improving in my role.”
2. Ask for a specific perspective: “What’s one thing I’m doing well?”
3. Ask for a growth area: “What’s one thing I could do differently or better?”
4. Ask for an example: “Can you think of a recent situation where you saw that?”
5. Ask what good looks like: “What would you recommend I do differently next time?”

For example, in a 1:1:

“I’d really value your feedback on how I’m doing. What’s one thing you think I’m doing particularly well, and what’s one thing I could improve? If you have an example of where I could have handled something differently, I’d especially appreciate that.” You can make it even more useful by specifying what kind of feedback you want—for example, performance, communication, leadership, prioritization, or readiness for the next level. HBR specifically recommends distinguishing between evaluation, coaching, and appreciation rather than simply asking for “feedback.”

One particularly strong question is:

“If you were in my position, what’s one thing you would start doing, stop doing, or do differently?” And after your manager answers, resist the urge to explain or defend yourself. Ask, “Can you tell me a little more about that?” That often turns a polite answer into genuinely useful coaching.

Asking for feedback effectively comes down to making it specific, low-pressure, and actionable for your manager. Here is a clear, step-by-step approach to doing it right:

- *"What is one thing I could start doing, and one thing I should stop or change?"* 
- *"Where do you think I could have added more value on [Project X]?"* 

Would you like me to give you a word-for-word email/Slack template or help you brainstorm specific questions tailored to a recent project you finished?

The best approach is to make the request specific, timely, and focused on growth rather than asking a broad “How am I doing?” Specific questions tend to produce much more actionable feedback.

A good formula is:

“I’m working on X. I’d like your perspective on Y. What’s one thing I could do differently to be more effective?”

For example:

• “After that client presentation, what’s one thing I could have done better?”
• “As I take on more responsibility, what’s one skill you think I should focus on developing?”
• “What’s something I’m doing well that I should continue, and what’s one thing you’d like me to change?”
• “If you were in my position, what would you prioritize improving over the next few months?”

A particularly effective tactic

Before asking, give your manager your own assessment. For example: “I think the project went well because of X, but I felt I could have communicated Y more clearly. Do you agree, or do you see it differently?” This gives them something concrete to react to and demonstrates self-awareness.

Then, when they give you feedback, ask:

“Can you give me an example?” “What would you have liked to see instead?” “What would be the highest-impact thing for me to work on?”

Finally, act on it and circle back later. That turns feedback from a one-time conversation into an ongoing development loop.

If you want the single best question, I'd use:

“What’s one thing I could do differently that would make me more effective in my role?” It’s direct, confident, and difficult to answer with a generic “you’re doing great.”

The best way to ask for feedback from your manager is to ask specific, narrow questions rather than vague ones like "How am I doing?"

Steps to Request Feedback

1. Pick the right time : Ask right after finishing a major project, following a big presentation, or during a regular one-on-one meeting.
2. Give a heads-up : Let your manager know ahead of time what you want to discuss so they have time to prepare.
3. Use targeted questions : Focus on specific skills, tasks, or interactions instead of general performance.
4. Listen without defending : Take notes and accept the input graciously , even if it is hard to hear.
5. Follow up : Show how you applied the advice to prove you value their guidance.

Examples of Specific Questions to Ask

• "What is one thing I can start, stop, or continue doing on our team projects?"
• "How could I have improved my communication during the client presentation yesterday?"
• "What is a key skill I should focus on developing over the next three months?"

If you'd like, tell me:

• What specific situation or project you just finished
• Whether you want to ask in person or via email

I can help you write the exact script to send or say to your manager.

The best way to ask your manager for feedback is to make it specific, timely, and focused on growth rather than just asking “How am I doing?” Broad questions often get broad answers, while targeted questions make it easier for your manager to give useful guidance.

A good approach:

1. Pick the right moment

   • Bring it up in a 1:1, after finishing a project, after a presentation, or during a regular check-in when the work is still fresh.

2. Explain why you’re asking

   • Frame it around improving and contributing more effectively.
   • Example: “I’d like to make sure I’m focusing on the right things and continuing to improve.”

3. Ask focused questions Instead of:

   • “Do you have any feedback for me?”

   Try:

   • “What’s one thing I’m doing well that I should continue?”
   • “What’s one thing I could do differently to have a bigger impact?”
   • “Is there a skill or area you think I should develop over the next few months?”
   • “Looking at my recent project, what would you have done differently?”
   • “What’s something I could start, stop, or continue doing?”

4. Be open to constructive feedback

   • Avoid explaining or defending immediately. You can ask follow-up questions like:
     • “Can you give me an example?”
     • “What would a stronger approach look like?”
     • “What would success look like in that area?”

5. Follow up on what you heard

   • Summarize the main points and revisit progress later. Acting on feedback helps turn the conversation into ongoing development rather than a one-time discussion.

A simple way to start the conversation:

“I’d appreciate your feedback on how I’m doing and where I could improve. I’d especially like to know what I should keep doing, what I could do differently, and where I can have a bigger impact.”

If you tell me your situation (new job, performance review, promotion goal, difficult manager, etc.), I can suggest a more tailored approach.

Asking for feedback effectively comes down to being specific, making it low-friction for your manager, and timing it right. Here is a clear, structured way to approach it:

1. Timing - Ask for feedback during or right after a significant project milestone, or tee it up at the end of a regular 1-on-1 meeting so they aren't caught off guard.
2. Specificity - Broad questions like "How am I doing?" often get vague answers like "You're doing great." Instead, anchor your question to a recent task, presentation, or skill (1-on-1 focus).
3. The "Two-Part" Formula - Ask for one thing you did well (to reinforce strengths) and one specific area for growth or adjustment (to drive improvement).
4. Actionability - Close the loop by thanking them and briefly stating how you plan to apply their insight moving forward.

Examples of What to Say

• During a 1-on-1: "For the [Project Name] we just wrapped up, what do you feel was my strongest contribution, and what is one thing you'd like me to approach differently next time?"
• Over Slack/Email (to prepare them in advance): "Ahead of our next catch-up, I've been reflecting on my communication during the recent client syncs. I'd love to get your read on where I hit the mark and where I can sharpen my approach."
• After a major presentation: "Do you have 2 minutes to share some quick notes on how that pitch went? I'm especially curious if the data section landed clearly for the stakeholders."

If you'd like, let me know:

• Is this for a regular 1-on-1 , an annual/quarterly review , or after a specific project?
• Are you looking for positive reinforcement or trying to correct a specific issue?

I can help you draft a tailored script for your exact situation.

Asking your manager for feedback is a great way to grow, but it works best when you make it specific, low-pressure, and actionable. Here is the best way to approach it:

1. Schedule a dedicated time instead of asking on the fly or right before a meeting ends. Give them a heads-up so they can prepare.
2. Make the request specific by anchoring it to a recent project, presentation, or task. Broad questions like "How am I doing?" often get vague answers like "You're doing fine."
3. Send a brief agenda in advance so your manager knows what to expect. This shows respect for their time and lets them collect their thoughts.
4. Ask open-ended, forward-looking questions that invite constructive guidance rather than a simple yes/no.
5. Listen without defending when they share their thoughts. Take notes, thank them for their candor, and ask clarifying questions if needed.
6. Follow up on the feedback by sharing a small update later on how you applied their advice, which builds immense trust.

Examples of What to Say

• The Calendar Invite / Email Advance:
  "Hi [Manager Name], during our 1:1 next week, I’d love to spend about 10 minutes getting your feedback on how I handled the recent [Project Name] rollout—specifically around my communication with stakeholders. Let me know if that works for you!"
• The Specific In-Person Question:
  "I’ve been working on improving my turnaround time on code reviews/reports. Based on the last few I submitted, where do you think I can speed up without sacrificing quality?"
• The General Check-in Question:
  "What is one thing I could start doing, stop doing, or do differently to be more effective on the team this quarter?"

If you'd like, tell me:

• What specific situation or project you are hoping to get feedback on
• Your current relationship or meeting cadence with your manager

I can help you draft the exact message to send them.

The best approach is to make the request specific, timely, and focused on growth rather than simply asking, “How am I doing?” Specific questions tend to produce much more useful feedback.

A good formula is:

1. Pick a natural moment — a 1:1, after a project, or after an important presentation.
2. Share your own assessment first — briefly say what you think went well and what you're unsure about.
3. Ask for 1–2 concrete areas to improve.
4. Ask what “better” would look like.
5. Follow up later to show you've acted on the feedback.

For example, instead of:

“Do you have any feedback for me?”

Try:

“I’d like to keep improving my performance. Looking at the work I’ve done recently, what’s one thing you think I’m doing well and one thing I could do differently to have a bigger impact?”

Or, if you want particularly candid feedback:

“I’d really value your honest assessment. If you could change one thing about how I approach my work, what would you recommend?”

That last question is especially useful because it gives your manager something concrete to react to rather than making them generate a broad performance review from scratch.

One important tip: don't get defensive when you hear something you disagree with. A strong follow-up is, “Can you give me an example of when you saw that?” That turns vague criticism into something you can actually work on.

Asking for feedback effectively comes down to making it specific, low-friction, and forward-looking. Instead of a vague "how am I doing?", a targeted approach helps your manager give you actionable insights.

• Timing , pick the right moment by asking during a regular 1-on-1 rather than right before a major deadline or in a high-stress environment. Give a tiny heads-up so they can gather their thoughts.
• Specificity , focus on a recent project, presentation, or skill rather than your overall performance. Specific questions get specific answers.
• Actionability , frame the feedback around growth and the future ("What is one thing I can start doing...") rather than just grading the past.

Here is a step-by-step framework to handle the conversation:

1. Schedule a brief heads-up by dropping a quick note before your 1-on-1 so they aren't caught off guard (e.g., "During our next chat, I'd love to spend 5 minutes getting your thoughts on how I handled the X project").
2. Lead with a specific focus by identifying a concrete area you want to evaluate, such as a recent deliverable, your cross-functional communication, or your leadership on a task.
3. Ask high-yield questions that prompt constructive advice rather than generic praise.
4. Listen without defending by taking notes, thanking them for the perspective, and avoiding the urge to immediately explain away a critique.
5. Close with a small action item by summarizing what you heard and stating one change you plan to make based on their advice.

Here are a few templates you can adapt:

• For a recent project: "I've been reflecting on how the launch of Project X went. From your perspective, what is one thing I did well, and one thing I could have handled differently?"
• For general growth: "I'm looking to level up my [skill, e.g., technical writing / stakeholder management] over the next few months. Where do you see the biggest gap between where I am now and where I should be?"
• Low-pressure check-in: "Do you have any quick feedback for me on how I've been communicating updates in our team syncs lately?"

If you want to tailor this further, tell me:

• Are you asking for a general performance review or about a specific recent project?
• What is your manager's general communication style (direct vs. gentle)?

I can help you draft the exact script or email to send them.

The best approach is to make the request specific, low-pressure, and action-oriented. A vague “How am I doing?” often gets you “You’re doing fine,” whereas a focused question is much more likely to produce useful feedback.

Try this structure:

1. Say why you're asking: “I want to keep improving.”
2. Pick a specific area: communication, prioritization, leadership, a recent project, etc.
3. Ask what to continue and what to change.
4. Ask for an example if the feedback is vague.
5. Follow up later to show you've acted on it.

Good questions include:

• “What’s one thing I’m doing well that I should keep doing?”
• “What’s one thing I could do differently to be more effective?”
• “Is there anything I could improve in how I communicate or prioritize?”
• “Looking at the last project, what would you have liked me to handle differently?”
• “What would you like to see me do more of over the next few months?”

A particularly strong question:

“If you were in my position, what’s one thing you’d change about how I’m working?”

It invites candid advice without making the conversation feel like a formal performance review.

And when they give you criticism, resist the urge to explain or defend yourself immediately. A simple “That’s helpful—can you give me an example?” can turn a vague criticism into something you can actually act on.

If you tell me whether you're asking during a 1:1, by Slack/email, or in a performance review, I can suggest the most natural wording.